Does anyone know if agar-hacks.com works ? lett me know plz

Hello Twitter! #myfirstTweet

If you rub chop sticks together its a sign of disrespect but if you use them to play a bitching drum solo much honor will come your way

90% of parenting older kids is making sure they're not in the same room when they have to do homework.

"Daddy, tell me again about how you wasted time before Twitter existed?" "Well son, we used to look at clouds & pretend they were animals."

I walk with a limp so people think I have a gun in my boot. And because I sprained my ankle running away from a moth.

If you never include your body in your selfies, I am forced to assume that you don't have one. Carry on floating head selfie chick.

all I wanna do is [gunshot noise] [gunshot noise] [gunshot noise] [gunshot noise] [gunshot noise] move to a safer neighborhood

For a cat named Jingles, his tambourine accompaniment to my blistering bongo solo isn't that impressive.

@pbworld Thanks for this