🔥The 9th Round of Easy Loan, Earn $40 Reward is in progress❗️ ⏰ Promotion Period: January 15th - Feburary 15th, 2025 👉 Register now and check more details at gate.io/campaigns/358

How far off are we from $9 cappuccinos do you reckon

Check out my music on Apple Music. Listen now! music.lnk.to/TC6U81

I wonder, when Margot Robbie goes to the hairdresser and they comb her hair back flat and wet and button that little black mortician’s smock on her, does she look at her reflection under those cold white lights and think oh Jesus Christ too

“Bye bye birdie”

Wait wait … “this is an ex-parrot”

You don’t hear the term “ba-donk-a-donk” very much anymore

First time I saw an airpod case I thought it was dental floss

If Brexit had happened in 2023 we could have all been making quips about being Euro-Divergent

Elon Mux

If one person describes another person as a “literal angel”, avoid both those people

Went to a house party with my wife last night for about an hour. I only spoke to my wife, and while we were talking I got groped by ladies I didn’t know, three times. On the car ride home I got in trouble for it. So anyway I just want to know if the matriarchy is a thing now

This weather is incredible but it’s probably global warming isn’t it

Have u heard the kind of things people complain about in restaurants… the temperature of the table water… want to see the manager over the colour of the witlof… I just heard a lady complain because there was chicken in her Caesar salad? Which she ate? I’d love those problems

I’m looking for a YouTube channel that’s just videos of African gray parrots swearing with British accents

Is this really John Legend singing or AI

Of the “16 personalities” types, which do you think is the most likely to be a judge on The Voice?

I just joined LinkedIn and wow, that place is funny

LinkedIn VS Onlyfans. Both revolve around masturbation, but at least when you see a profile on onlyfans, it’s clear what that person actually does for a living