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OK still not great at typing. Please delete first "garden". Thanks. I am even feeling an urge to "post" regular tweets. Such as... What the hell does "woke" really mean? Whatever ,I am proud to be it. Please don't reply, and don't bother to explain it.Ta.

By the way, I am and always have been a huge rugby fan . I even used to be school rugby captain ! I will of course be watching the 3rd Test, but punch.ups , bites, dangerous tackles, endless rolling around on the ground.There are thrilling players ,use them!

Like most ageing codgers I take about a dozen different pills every day. You too? ? Ever forget ? My local pharmacy supplies me with see thru boxes with little compartments with sorted pills ,dates, times, and instructions. 4 months worth at a time. Brilliant! Try it..

Record medals for team GB. But few track and field. Bannister,Chataway ,Coe, Ovett etc relied on charity. BMX bikes, skateboards, climbing gear..merchandise sponsorship and advertising . Next New Sports. Computer games, playing stock market, betting,banking .Gold wins gold

1976. Olympics in Montreal. Bill Oddie, John Cleese and UK Athletes release "Superspike" to raise money so Britain's team can afford to go and compete. Brendan Foster gets bronze. I predict Steve Ovett will win gold at the next games. He does. Seek song on You Tube.

1976 Olympics in Montreal. Oddie , Cleese and UK athletes release record to raise money needed to send GB team! Brendan Foster wins bronze. I predict Steve Ovett will win gold at next games. He did.Hear "Superspike" still on You Tube.No need this year.

Well here's a coincidence- I have just been touching up a model Pelican in my garden. I want one like they have on the Danube Delta, even though I don't think it will lure pelicans to breed in Hampstead.

1974. Test at Lords.England total 629. India all out 42! 2021. Lords. How times have changed eh? INDIA play with aggression and joy. A real team. I confess I was willing them to win. Make England great again. 0ur footballers, our women's teams. Come on fellas!

Remember the Magical Magyars? Hungary first team to beat England at Wembley. 6-3! Then 7-1 in Hungary!. But Wolves beat Honved 3-2. I was there. Cut to Puskas stadium last week. Oh how sad. Young players great, old fans never change. Right Gareth?

Hey Miriam. It would really sadden me if you had me down as a Footlights mysogynist. I was incensed that women couldn't be "members", but I got no support from the "all male" council, whom I accused of not wanting the competition! Such as Germaine, Emma Thompson, and YOU! X

THE NORTH WATER BBC2 tonight. Don't watch.Complain. This series is an obscenity. Seal and whale slaughter. Totally realistic. A drama, a thriller, favourable reviews. No excuse. It still goes on. Horrific. Not TV . Based on a book.? So what?! Outrageous.

Who is Boris's speech writer? Stewart Lee? Ben Elton? Me? "Let's give him some really dumb jokes and crass insults that make him seem like a total twat." The PM replies: "I don't need anyone, I can do that myself." That's the truth. "The truth?! I don't understand."

Join Malala Yousafzai and Afghan women's rights advocates Zarqa Yaftali & Shaharzad Akbar شهرزاد اکبر's urgent call to world leaders to get Afghan girls back in school #LetAfghanGirlsLearn fb.avaaz.org/campaign/en/ge…

BARRY CRYER. A truly lovely man.

Barry's message on my last birthday. " Fuckin mobile." How true. How wise. Loved BARRY.

In case you're wondering. Or if you're not. The past few years have been a bit grim. For me, I mean. Illnesses, Couldn't work. Not wanted anyway!? Tech blind.Lost enthusiasm."But I am still here." Turning into Ethel Merman? Still, so many people are a lot worse.

RIP...John Burton, Fauna and Flora, World Land Trust. A man who not only cared deeply about wildlife, but knew which humans could be trusted and which could not . A man who got things done, world wide.He was my mentor ..I hope I helped him sometimes.