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My girlfriend from high school just texted me for the first time in 8 years asking how to start a digital asset treasury company

“Ya ok, but we need crypto because super intelligent AI agents will never ever be allowed to create a bank account” -guy with 80 IQ who was allowed to create a bank account

Still the first inning of the bull run. Also the 9th inning of full societal collapse. Guess what comes next? if you know reach out I genuinely have no idea

I didn’t think I’d become one of those parents but when I go out to dinner now with my 4 year old I just bring him an iPad so he can trade on Hyperliquid

Base is the chain for people who love Ted Lasso

“I wish Base would die” Chief golden retriever Jesse: “Well guess what? I love you. You are valued. Your criticisms are heard. I still want you onchain. Base is for everyone. Coin it. can I offer you a cold-pressed Erewhon juice to brighten your day?”

Just tuned into Pump Q2 earnings call. Well known fund manager ThreadGuy had a lot of great questions for management, including “why do you keep aura farming?” And “what does Jew mode mean?” Analysts have since downgraded Pump to a sell.

President Trump personally watches my onchain wallets and waits for me to open a perp long to announce a new tariff

Oh ya first inning things

not now kitten I’m turning your Etsy store that does $800 ARR into a publicly listed treasury vehicle

I talked with Joshua Lim about treasury companies, specifically how they are structured from the start, deal mechanics, whos getting into the things etc. Josh is one of the best sources because he’s helping to facilitate a lot of these deals. Really fascinating, have a listen

Zora is Pumpdotfun for people who shop at REI

I beta tested your app and you did not give me seven figures in your company’s equity. For my next act, I will spend 8 hours in the Discord threatening to kill myself.

they’re probably just coming to start a treasury company 🤷‍♀️

Jesse 2 years from now tracking down the last content creator who hasn’t coined some bullshit