get me to God's country

This is Flannel Del Rey

my first committed relationship was to the bit

White culture? You mean probiotics ?

Most sane thing he’s ever said.

How many tampons did Katie Perry take into space?

My comedy is exclusively for people who smoke indoors.

The Tiffani Amber Thiessen color changing marg from Chili’s would fix me.

This is going to be so hard to fuck

“Freak off” has been said so many times this week that it’s completely lost its meaning.

“We are the Statler and Waldorf of this back yard” - Flannel Del Rey

All that money and Spike Lee can’t get his novelty suit tailored…

Not GAY as in HAPPY but QUEER as in “Can I please have that with oat milk?”

Smdh…kids in other countries are gonna be riding these to school next week.

This place has everything

Hey girl, you dropped your name tag.

Hawk Tuah Girl #Superman #SupermanMovie

“What’s wrong with Trump’s ankles??” “Why do his hands look like that??” Y’all do not visit your grandparents often enough.

Trump: “I obviously didn’t make that drawing for Epstein! He doesn’t even know what pubic hair on a woman looks like!!!”

Malcolm Jamal Warner, Ozzy Osbourne, and Hulk Hogan died? Tragic week for the leather jacket industry.