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If you ever think English is not a weird language just remember that read and lead rhyme and read and lead rhyme. But read and lead don't rhyme, and neither do read and lead.

As a fifty something chap who has eaten French cheese after 9pm, I can only live in fear of the dreams ahead this night. It is a significant rule in life "Do not, under any circumstances, eat French cheese after 9pm." If I am tweeting at 3am, you know whey.

***Tales from the river*** The morning dip was utterly peaceful May your day be peaceful too.

He deleted almost every app from his phone. Then he wrote 4 bestsellers in 9 years. Cal Newport's controversial take: Your phone is making you mediocre. His science-backed system for getting your brain back:

This is possibly the only thing that gives me hope about the state of British journalism.

***PROPERTY KLAXON*** "OK Brian, we'll need a million gallons of magnolia" "Yes, but the bathroom will still be triangular..." zoopla.co.uk/for-sale/detai…