Everybody wants a bigger dick until you have a trimix boner that won't go down and you have to walk around with it tucked in your waistband.

Gonna go to poundtown right quick, y'all need anything?

Seriously, how have I never gotten a "foot tap under the bathroom stall" signal and it happens now while I'm pooping in the grocery store.

I'll get back to rubbing my butthole all over the internet again shortly, but I just took over as Executive Chef of three restaurants, so I'm a little busy rn.

I just realized that I passed on the offers of all those subs that have offered to clean the house for Cain and I... I could be saving so much on labor costs if I convinced them to wash dishes in my restaurant. I mean... they probably have rubber gear already.

Does anyone else just absolutely love that moment where you see a guy take off his underwear and his dick bounces out? Even if I've seen it a million times... It's like, "cherish this moment. Make a mental montage...."