🔥The 9th Round of Easy Loan, Earn $40 Reward is in progress❗️ ⏰ Promotion Period: January 15th - Feburary 15th, 2025 👉 Register now and check more details at gate.io/campaigns/358

These are the unintended consequences of killing Jeffrey Epstein. With pedophilia off the menu billionaires are just flailing.

I wish Tom Cruise wasn’t the only 60 year old man who was into motorcycles to ride one off a cliff.

I want people to laugh but I also want them to THINK.

Celebrity podcasts are a form of astroturfing.

Hey @AbyssCreations if I buy a real doll can you make it with buttholes (fuckable) for eyes and two extra hairy dicks and a Pusey for an asshole asking for a friend (Vince Mancini)

I used to work in a museum gift shop stock room, and one time I was in the break room with a coworker who was reading a book and kept exclaiming, “Woo!” while she fanned herself with her hand. She later explained it was a book about an island inhabited by men with huge dicks.

Stop with the colored contacts. You look like you have eye cancer.

Being friends with Diaper Boyz is a constant source of joy

Can’t wait for anyone’s money any longer, so I sold all my blood to film my first hour. I’m A.I. now.

Thank you to everyone who came out to Diaper Boyz’s Olsen Run Comedy Club! So honor to play my good friend’s comedy club and pack it out with the swarm! The club is amazing, the staff is awesome and the crowds were 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥! Eugene is an amazing comedy town! Let’s run it

*drives into the lesbian neighborhood “They clappin pidgeons”

My wife just turned to me and goes, “Hey, I just thought of something. Emailio Addresstivez.'"

Hey Uncle Jim and Aunt Jenny, I’m in the new GOT episode tonight I play Girl Getting Throated #1

I went to a Hawk Tuah immersion school as a boy.

First time I wanted a chimp to chew someone’s face off just because their makeup was so bad

Hey Vince Mancini give your mom a high five for me when you see her. I know she’s had this dream for so long.

Everyone focuses on the alien’s acid blood but it’s pubic hair is made of monofilament fishing line and you get super tangled in it if you try to touch it’s balls.

i hate when people don’t get enough Botox and their lips aren’t juicy DSLs.

We celebrate the day Oprah Winfrey invented Jelq’ing.

Why would we take over a country with no golf courses?