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Can't find a Cheddarman #CheeseSongs After Midnight

Big Bang Baby Swiss #CheeseSongs After Midnight

Brie Came in Through the Bathroom Window #CheeseSongs After Midnight

Cheese Come Home For Swissmas #CheeseSongs After Midnight

Please Cheese Me - The Brie-tles #CheeseSongs After Midnight

There's no basement at The Alamo. #JanHooks

Riot at #PumpkinFest last night? Man. Sometimes the world is a vampire. #SmashingPumpkins #Smashing #keenestate #keenepumpkinfest #pumpkin

#PeytonManning story = big time news. #BanksyArrested = big time ruse. #Halloween soon = #CharlestonChews #Banksy #Peyton509 #Peyton

His legs. #ThingsLongerThanOscarsSentence

Intentional walks result in the entire stadium and all opposing players all chanting "PUS-SIES! PUS-SIES!" #ImprovedBaseball After Midnight

Celebrate and encourage steroid use. #ImprovedBaseball After Midnight

Three ins per outing sounds more optimistic than three outs per inning. #ImprovedBaseball After Midnight

Any time a strike is called, replace the bat with a picket sign. After Midnight #ImprovedBaseball

A deck instead of a stupid, deckless circle for when you're "on deck". After Midnight #ImprovedBaseball

Replace sunflower seeds with tabs of LSD. #ImprovedBaseball After Midnight

Dear Diary, My name is #BridgetJones and up until yesterday everybody had forgotten about me. #ReneeZellweger

#MichaelSam 's tenure. #ThingsLongerThanOscarsSentence

Just sabotaged the comedyconnection hardcore show! #BeastieBoys #sabotage #dunkindonuts #ri #aviators… instagram.com/p/u14Gvftjqu/

I didn't #vote but I DID unfollow a bunch of people. Change starts with you.

The laundromat is like a high school dance. Nobody wants me near them and everyone's scraping change together to buy white powder.