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Yes we eat leftovers from plates 😂😂

Had to help two old dears guess their pin numbers yesterday. We worked with dates of birth but both too sozzled to remember how old they were. Got there in the end. 1933! Fingers crossed that will be me in 38 years. 💪🏻🍷 💪🏻🍷

Lost someone who was a really important part of my life. So I’m dealing with it by getting really drunk and dancing around my bedroom in my knickers.

Ate so much pasta I can’t bend anymore.

Why do people never remember what they ordered for their meal at a wedding. If I’m getting free food, trust me, I’m counting the days down until I eat it. I know EXACTLY what’s coming.

Been stuck under a tree for an hour on Hampstead Heath due to the torrential rain. #summer

If you take a cake into a restaurant, make sure there is enough for the staff. Not least because you probably made them store it, plate it and undoubtedly sing for you. Thank you table 110. Lots of cake today. ❤️

Stop taking plates from my hands. It is my job to deliver your food and place it on the table. Put your fucking hands down Sharon.

Never getting in the sea ever again 😧

Can’t get an avocado anywhere. What’s the world coming to?

Just wept my way through gladiator 2. Magnificent.

It’s almost that time of year when you can eat Christmas cake and Stilton for breakfast every morning 🎉

‘Tis the season to remember that waiting Staff are people too. 🫠

One of the many reasons.

Special shout out to the ‘lady’ that made a waitress cry because we didn’t serve chicken nuggets. You’re splendid.

I’m on my second venison tartare of the day. Starting the year as I meant to go on.

Just me over here lusting over Kevin Costner’s dad bod in Yellowstone. 😍

I’ve already eaten two trifles today.