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Papal conclave. YOU choose the new joke! The new Private Eye is out now

From the carer’s allowance scandal to an investigation into British universities’ harsh measures against pro-Palestinian protests on campus... The shortlist for the 2025 Paul Foot Award for Investigative Journalism has been announced!  The winner, who will receive a prize of

Toby Carvery From the new Private Eye, in shops now.

“The God-Emperor would like a 9,495th term. And also a cheeseburger” From the new Private Eye, out now.

Number crunching: Tesco’s predicted reduction in profit v increase in profits during the cost-of-living crisis From the new Private Eye, out now.

With new junk food ad restrictions coming into force this October, adland is already finding ways to dodge them, borrowing tactics from Big Tobacco with sports sponsorships, social media stunts, and cryptic campaigns. Full story in Ad Nauseam in the new Private Eye, out now.

It’s 19 years since David Cameron described Ukip supporters as “fruitcakes, loonies and closet racists”. In the run-up to yesterday’s elections, candidates for Reform UK, Ukip’s successor party, seemed to be doing their best to live up to that description in one way or another…

Gnomemart: Why should cardinals have all the fun? Now you can have your own conclave at home with The Pape Vape™  From the new Private Eye, out now.

Amol Rajan meets Gary Lineker From the new Private Eye, out now.

Is Putin stringing me along? Was the Pope Catholic? Subscribe to Private Eye: subsonline.co.uk

“You stopped being a young guy in a flat cap, and started being an old guy in a flat cap” From the latest Private Eye, in shops now

Vehement campaigning for and against the government’s proposal for introducing regional or “zonal” electricity pricing has erupted just as Eye 1644 anticipated – and energy secretary Ed Miliband is on the back foot. Full story online and in the latest issue:

What's the biggest story Private Eye can't publish but knows to be true...

🎧 New PAGE 94 Podcast OUT NOW This week: PAGE 94 LIVE In a world-first live show broadcast from the Cambridge Literary Festival, the team answer all the most pressing questions about Private Eye. Is there a future for print? Which cover caused most cancellations? Which of

Lookalike: Thompson / Clarkson From the latest Private Eye, in shops now.

More on the company running security at Teesside Freeport - denies that drug dealer who signed as managing director is in charge so must be his father, who’s still running away from £1.5m bill for tax dodging. What could go wrong? Details in current Private Eye Magazine.

The most memorable moment from a Private Eye lunch... Listen in full to the latest episode of Page 94 where the team answer all the most pressing questions about Private Eye. 🎧 Full episode: pod.fo/e/2d172f

Life imitates Eye: Who will be the next Pope? L: BBC News R: Latest edition of Private Eye

Do Eye readers unsubscribe when they are offended by a cartoon or cover? Listen to the latest episode of the Page 94 podcast where the team answer all the most pressing questions about Private Eye.  🎧 Full episode: pod.fo/e/2d172f

White smoke over Soho can only mean one thing: A new front page gag has been chosen… IT’S PRIVATE EYE WEEK! New edition in shops and with subscribers from Wednesday.