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Aw man i just discovered this. Jimmy sheirgill ❤︎

School mein class ki har bench par char log baithte the aur mere bench par paanch.

Akbar ke zamaane mein paida hota to log mujhe bhaale ki jagh use karte.

Chicken leg khaate-khaate apni ungliya kaat leta hun. Pata hi nhi chalta kab wo khatm aur ye shuru.

Sparta mein paida hota to badi beizzati karata unki.

Aaj ek cheeti pair ke niche aa gayi. Jaise hi pair uthaya, aram se chal di.

Shayad ab wajan thoda badh jae. #PornBan

Shoot pe sab mujhe camera pakdakr monopod ki tarah use krte hain.

Aaj lays ka packet khola to andar ki hawa se hi pet bhar gaya.

Ek akele insaan ne poora pahad tod dia. Yahan mujhse candy ka wrapper nhi fatt rha. #Manjhi

Party ke 1 mahine baad aaj hangover utara hai. Twitter ka password bhi yaad aa gya.

Jis din Science class mein suna ki moon par wajan 1/6th ho jata hai, Us din se astronaut banne ki ichcha marr gayi.

Aaj blood bank gaya tha blood donate karne. Mujhe dekhte hi wapas bhej dia.

Aaj ek bhikaari ko paise dene wallet nikal rha tha. Usne rokkar kuch chillar die aur bola jakr kuchh kha lo.

Doctor ne bhook lagne ki medicines di. Unhi se pet bhar jata hai.

Mere-great-grandfather ki photo. Ek hi bachi hai. #proud

Aaj kuchh dosto ke saath Pillow Fight Club shuru kiya hai. Socha fun bhi ho jaega aur safe bhi hai.

Nurse ne Injection lagaya to ek side se gaya aur doosre se nikal gaya

Auto mei baith jata hun uske baad bhi log aakr auto wale se poochte hain, bhaiya chaloge?

Teen baar bola Maharaja Mac chahie to bhi poochte hain Sir McAloo tikki ya Chicken Mcgrill. I'm not lovin it.