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But Jhené Aiko Efuru Chilombo is the real mvp #SuperBowlLVI

No one in the history of humanity has ever swept all the dirt into the dustpan. Prove me wrong

Going rogue in target grabbing all the unnecessary things and the song comes on like “control yourself.. take only what you neeeed”... I said, not today universe

Took an Ativan to make myself go to the dentist and then afterwards I bought ice cream, cookies & cake at the grocery store.. then I went home and promptly fell asleep for 4 hrs. Is this the real me?

What’s even the point of a grocery store that doesn’t have Claussens

I don’t know who needs to hear this but: it’s ok to name your Siamese cat something other than Blue..

Walked through the Grove touristing some people around and the only thing I got excited about was a dog harness with dinosaurs on it… so you know where I’m at in life. Also I do not have a dog.

I got some friends I don’t see or talk to anymore, for no reason other than life rolling on. I just love em from afar now instead of up close

Never trust a puppy around a flip flop

Ive been looking for my AirPods for days… searching high & low. Today I reached for the box of chocolate covered cherries on the top shelf of the pantry… what was in there? AirPods. Did I have a snack blackout? How did they get there.somebody plz cut me off

HOT TAKE: It’s way easier to back into a parking spot… I can see exactly where my tires are going with mirrors and backup cam, why does this bother ppl so much?? Let me do me!!!

When someone is soft spoken I cannot tell if they’re really nice or really creepy but either way I’m out

My Target strategy is.. don’t get a basket (definitely not a cart) I only buy what I can carry 😅 I really be getting creative tho, hanging swimsuits off my purse n shit

My toxic trait is that every designer dog I see on the street I have a strong urge to ask the owner what shelter they got it from 😅😅

Not sure why calling strangers ‘bestie’ is a thing now. It comes off real corny & fake to me. My actual best friends get their title, no one else. Ever.

Do you ever need to do something but you “have all day” so you don’t do it all day

Hot take?: Not all cat people are weirdos but all weirdos are cat people

Thanks to the car blasting Jazmine Sullivan so loud at 6am outside my window that I thought she might be out there fr and I put on a bra to go check

I think any business who decides to discriminate should be required to disclose it, giving us a chance to promptly never go there again

The other day I had to go inside the bank for something and there was a super long line. Every single person was staring at their tiny boxes. Just makes me sad. Really showing my age here but I just wish people were less “connected” and more connected