UnitedStatesSenate (@usasenate) 's Twitter Profile
UnitedStatesSenate

@usasenate

Sorry, I suck!

ID: 358552910

calendar_today20-08-2011 03:19:14

10 Tweet

333 Followers

63 Following

UnitedStatesSenate (@usasenate) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Sorry citizens! Lately things have been going too well in the gun violence dept. to make changes. Our apologies! Message approved by the NRA

UnitedStatesSenate (@usasenate) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Don't you see? If only that on-duty police officer at MIT was carrying a gun then perhaps he could have used a tactic we call "self-defense"

UnitedStatesSenate (@usasenate) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Our primary goal is not to serve American citizens. It is, in fact, to undermine Barack Hussain Obama at the expense of human lives.

UnitedStatesSenate (@usasenate) 's Twitter Profile Photo

We are in fact serving the American public. Think about it this way: what would news be after all without a little good-hearted tragedy?

UnitedStatesSenate (@usasenate) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Our founding fathers were inherently wrong. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness actually means guns, Jesus, and white supremacy.

UnitedStatesSenate (@usasenate) 's Twitter Profile Photo

It is imperative that we divert our attention from any significance and answer the question: Fifty Shades of Gray, an American classic?

UnitedStatesSenate (@usasenate) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I am proud to announce that tonight I will rest well with a certainty that I have paved the way for even bigger and better violence to come.

UnitedStatesSenate (@usasenate) 's Twitter Profile Photo

BREAKING NEWS: It's been confirmed that every senate member is an imbecile! Between this news and the recent gun violence, we're overjoyed!