matt walsh has never had a friend drunkenly say "i love you dude, you're the best" and that explains so much about his everything

Guys, we are so back! It looks like The Onion has funding again, and this new election clip is better than ever.

Sexism really making a last minute surge!

I wrote in Joe Biden 😔

What if Donald Trump got drunk tonight for the first time?

Maybe we should start the steal?

I’m recording the election, so don’t tell me who wins

So, for those of you who believe in stop the steal, what happened? Did voting get fixed? Do we trust the system again? Honestly curious on what the take is.

Ah the party of love, Christ and family ❤️

So funny that the first thing they did was hire a social media manager.

Just realized I already forgot the name Doug Emhoff 😔

I want them to call my funeral a “wrap party”

If billionaires keep being attacked, we’re gonna watch the “public opinion” of gun laws change real quick

If Ellen was still around, we would have only brought the boom once. However the rizzler would continue to be a generational talent

So did we ever find out who this guy is?

I’m blaming David Dobrick for the fires

nothing has given me more existential dread than the level of dickriding every tech platform is doing to stay in that man’s good graces

Imagine being the richest man in the world, and your passion project is to stop providing aid to poor, desperate people.

Kanye’s tweets are Elons thoughts

Social media rewards delusional people