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Academics are pessimistic every moment of their lives EXCEPT when estimating how many articles they'll grade on the plane

Schumer is right. For once, he's not caving: he's choosing the least bad option.

The two worst feelings in academia are writing and not writing

Three days ago Trump took away my non-existent security clearance…. At the same time his cabinet was texting top secret plans with a member of the media on board. Copy that

Just leaving this here.

we’re gonna have Ackman doing land acknowledgments by May at this rate

Millions of workers are about to learn a lesson in FAFO economics.

I’m taking a break from my mental health to focus on my academic work

Airports are full of people who have discovered “life hacks” where the hack consists of violating social norms.

Ah, the good old days.

To assist Democrats on their quest to sound like normal people here is a short guide of things normal people never say/do: Ci-male Undocumented person Pregnant person Oligarchy Late stage capitalism My pronouns are No one is illegal That thing where you snap instead of clap.

The solution is to embrace LLMs, encourage students to use them as "thinking buddies" or private tutors at home––which is how I use it, and how they'll be using it for the rest of their lives. For exams, pivot to ~100% in-class essays and oral exams. Worked like a charm in my

It’s incredible how right-wing anti-vax pseudo-medical bullshit now is blurring into left-wing moonbat organic-radish-farm indigenous-roots-&-berries medical bullshit. Both movements idealize an Edenic state of man, which has been corrupted by the evil snake of western science

If everyone would just gain 30 IQ points and learn stats and basic physics and economics, maybe this democracy thing could really work.

Then they came for the political scientists, but I had already laid them off.

Kamala and Hillary watching the rapid unscheduled disassembly of a bromance.

So Elon goes "Kill the Bill!" and Trump goes "Elon has TDS!" so Elon goes "I'm the reason Trump won!" so Trump goes "we waste billions on Elon!" so Elon goes "Epstein!" and a flunkie goes "Deport!" and Elon goes "Impeach!" And THAT'S why women are too emotional to be President.

English: Hello French: Bonjour Japanese: Konnichiwa Oxford graduate: Did you know I went to Oxford?

Dividing your time between 40% research, 40% teaching, and 80% admin