Eliza Skinner (@elizaskinner) 's Twitter Profile
Eliza Skinner

@elizaskinner

Stand-up comic & Emmy winning comedy writer… Headwriter/Roaster Toaster #EarthToNed (Disney+)... co-host On The Podium podcast… she/her/mistress… comedy album👇

ID: 15690771

linkhttps://linktr.ee/elizaskinner calendar_today01-08-2008 16:09:28

52,52K Tweet

65,65K Followers

1,1K Following

Eliza Skinner (@elizaskinner) 's Twitter Profile Photo

There is a certain inherent confidence in depression. Like “my need to not give a fuck is more important than society’s pressure to get my nails done, or shower.”

Eliza Skinner (@elizaskinner) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Word to the wise: if you have a Petco Vetco clinic in your area that is not completely incompetent, consider yourself very lucky. I have been to 2 in my area and both were terrible. 1 vet appointment, 1 vaccination clinic appointment, both complete wastes of time.

Eliza Skinner (@elizaskinner) 's Twitter Profile Photo

“-Everything will turn out all right. You’ll see. -I can’t imagine how, said Atreyu. -Neither can I, said the luckdragon. But that’s the best part of it.” - The Neverending Story by Michael Ende

caitie delaney (@caitiedelaney) 's Twitter Profile Photo

if you’re unfollowing me because I’m posting too much about my city burning listen I get it but boy have I got some news about your future and your city. looking away hasn’t been an option for a long time

Eliza Skinner (@elizaskinner) 's Twitter Profile Photo

In a small act of resistance, I refuse to pause my life for today’s celebration of our new low - so my Etsy shop was just updated with some new items. THATS RIGHT, IM SAVING AMERICA BY LISTING MY POTTERY FOR SALE. I DID IT. HERES A LINK: booberryjones.etsy.com

In a small act of resistance, I refuse to pause my life for today’s celebration of our new low - so my Etsy shop was just updated with some new items.  THATS RIGHT, IM SAVING AMERICA BY LISTING MY POTTERY FOR SALE. I DID IT. HERES A LINK: booberryjones.etsy.com
Eliza Skinner (@elizaskinner) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I’m having a big old MEGA SALE at the Little Art Market this weekend. I have too much pottery, and it’s all gotta go to make room for new stuff! Plus we have new vendors and returning favorites. Come get a drink in the coffeeshop and poke around!

I’m having a big old MEGA SALE at the Little Art Market this weekend. I have too much pottery, and it’s all gotta go to make room for new stuff! Plus we have new vendors and returning favorites. Come get a drink in the coffeeshop and poke around!
Jesse Case (@jessecase) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I don't like how people can tweet that "natural disasters are a conspiracy", but since they're smart-phoning it, they don't know they have Dark Ages Brain. Like, you should be shouting that in front of an alchemist's hut before you trade your turnips for some leeches, you freak.

Eliza Skinner (@elizaskinner) 's Twitter Profile Photo

A lot of people don’t know this, but the actual name of that stupid military operation yesterday in LA was “Someone Left The Cake Out In The Rain.”