FrancescoMarciuliano (@fmarciuliano) 's Twitter Profile
FrancescoMarciuliano

@fmarciuliano

#1 New York Times bestselling author. Sally Forth. Judge Parker. New book OH. IT'S YOU. LOVE POEMS BY CATS available for pre-order.

ID: 107129460

linkhttp://medium-large.com calendar_today21-01-2010 16:47:42

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Angry Santa Elf (@angrysantaelf) 's Twitter Profile Photo

CHRISTMAS EVE REMINDER: I'll once again be live-tweeting Santa's ENTIRE ride on December 24th, from when we first leave the North Pole to when we finally return reeking of the good booze and pricey perfumes we swiped from your homes.

CHRISTMAS EVE REMINDER: I'll once again be live-tweeting Santa's ENTIRE ride on December 24th, from when we first leave the North Pole to when we finally return reeking of the good booze and pricey perfumes we swiped from your homes.
Angry Santa Elf (@angrysantaelf) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Happy Winter Solstice! Or as Santa calls it, "Oh f***, do I have to deliver gifts on this day, too?!" #WinterSolstice #FirstDayofWinter

Happy Winter Solstice! Or as Santa calls it, "Oh f***, do I have to deliver gifts on this day, too?!" #WinterSolstice #FirstDayofWinter
Angry Santa Elf (@angrysantaelf) 's Twitter Profile Photo

It's Festivus Eve, when Santa's unemployed brother-in-law Vic goes all around the world in his 1978 AMC Pacer delivering metal poles, grievance prompts, and makeshift octagon cages for family fun feats of strength.

Angry Santa Elf (@angrysantaelf) 's Twitter Profile Photo

ONE DAY TIL CHRISTMAS EVE!!! And we'll get right back to work as soon as we wrestle the head of the household—Santa—to the floor, thus ending our Festivus celebration. #Festivus

Angry Santa Elf (@angrysantaelf) 's Twitter Profile Photo

REMINDER: Tomorrow—CHRISTMAS EVE—I'll be live-tweeting Santa's ENTIRE ride, including the part when the Misfit Toys realize we just delivered them to another forgotten island halfway around the world.

REMINDER: Tomorrow—CHRISTMAS EVE—I'll be live-tweeting Santa's ENTIRE ride, including the part when the Misfit Toys realize we just delivered them to another forgotten island halfway around the world.
Angry Santa Elf (@angrysantaelf) 's Twitter Profile Photo

THE CHRISTMAS EVE RIDE BEGINS! Okay, it began a few hours ago but Santa did a barrel roll and the toy sack wasn’t tied closed and the screams of a billion toys plummeting into the Arctic Ocean still haunts me. So to answer your question, Billy Age 6, yes, toys are alive. Or were.

THE CHRISTMAS EVE RIDE BEGINS! Okay, it began a few hours ago but Santa did a barrel roll and the toy sack wasn’t tied closed and the screams of a billion toys plummeting into the Arctic Ocean still haunts me. So to answer your question, Billy Age 6, yes, toys are alive. Or were.
FrancescoMarciuliano (@fmarciuliano) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Neighbor's display a nod to that forgotten Rankin/Bass holiday cartoon "Christmas Dinosaur Saves Christmas with Misfit Christmas Powers and Also There's an Evil Wizard or Warlock or Something and Maybe We've Made Too Many of These Specials."

Neighbor's display a nod to that forgotten Rankin/Bass holiday cartoon "Christmas Dinosaur Saves Christmas with Misfit Christmas Powers and Also There's an Evil Wizard or Warlock or Something and Maybe We've Made Too Many of These Specials."
FrancescoMarciuliano (@fmarciuliano) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Sally Forth Error: In the below panel what I meant to have Ted say was "WITH a bag of cinnamon rolls." Not "and." That said, the possibility Ted would go to the office wearing sweet pastry seemed to faze no one. Jim Keefe

Sally Forth Error: In the below panel what I meant to have Ted say was "WITH a bag of cinnamon rolls." Not "and." That said, the possibility Ted would go to the office wearing sweet pastry seemed to faze no one. <a href="/jim_keefe/">Jim Keefe</a>
FrancescoMarciuliano (@fmarciuliano) 's Twitter Profile Photo

"He thought he was the King of America Where they pour Coca Cola just like vintage wine Now I try hard not to become hysterical But I'm not sure if I am laughing or crying I wish that I could push a button And talk in the past and not the present tense"

FrancescoMarciuliano (@fmarciuliano) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Hulu ending its Oscars telecast right before the Best Actress and Best Picture awards was just its thoughtful way of reminding you to save money and not subscribe to Hulu.