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Nicki Minaj Wow nitro man Michael Nelson #gotatattoo 2022 #superman Hank Hill JOHN KIM #zztop Nationwide

I don’t have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem!

Where do I send my $8 to for that fancy verified check mark Elon Musk? No parody here, just a fine upstanding Texan.

Why would anyone do drugs when they can just mow a lawn?

Here's the latest from Kari Lake campaign manager, and my personal friend, Dale Gribble.

This is what happens when you put an idiot in charge of the propane department at Mega-lo-Mart. The same thing happens when car salesman Elon Musk buys Twitter.

I'm fine. It's no big deal. Social networks explode. That's what they do.

Ah, jeez. I think I need one of those $8 blue check marks.

Bobby, some things are like a tire fire—trying to put it out only makes it worse. You just gotta grab a beer and let it burn.

Bill's great with kids. It's adults and holidays he seems to have a problem with.

Merry Christmas from Arlen, Texas!

Am I doing this Dick pick thing right? Boomhauer says he does it all the time.

Bill just told me he's broke after subscribing to 123 OnlyFans sites. Is that some kind of Dallas Cowboy site?

deadline.com/2023/01/king-o…

Do I get some kind of award for this? The blue bird of valor from Twitter or something? #KingOfTheHill

Bobby showed me how to use #hashtags but I prefer #hashbrowns.

He uh, remember the movie on Lifetime, you know, what Gregory Harrison did to Valerie Bertinelli?

Soccer was invented by European ladies to keep them busy while their husbands did the cooking. #hankhill

Damn it, I thought I flushed you Dad.

You’re talking like a song from the Lion King, stop that.