My Octopus Teacher

Meanwhile on TikTok 😂

Apparently “DEMOCRATS ARE GONNA TAKE YOUR CHEESEBURGERS!” Is back in the news again so here’s my feelings on that

Not sure I'd be using the words "fleeing" and "Texas" in the same sentence, Senator Cancun

Please enjoy Harrison Ford watching a magic trick & then reacting in the only way Harrison Ford reacts to anything

. T-Pain gets his revenge against racist players in Call of Duty. x.com/defnoodles/sta…

Nancy Pelosi teared up at Biden’s speech. Nancy Pelosi teared up Trump’s speech. See the difference?

Congrats, Matt! You are the definition of the #FloridaMan.

PLOT TWIST: What if it turns out Andrew Giuliani is actually the dumbest Trump?

Matt Gaetz: fuuucked Joel Greenberg: fuuucked Rudy Giuliani: fuuucked Individual-1: tick tock, asshole Hillary: enjoying a nice walk in the woods, probably me: laughing at all you "lock her up" morons

Nothing says “betraying” your country like *checks notes* paid family leave, pre-k & school meals. Their bigoted attempts to spin our ideas as un-American is getting really desperate. I serve in Congress, progressives policies are popular and you are just going to have to deal.

BIG crash for Marc Márquez! 😱 Thankfully the eight-times champion is back on his feet! 💢 #SpanishGP 🇪🇸

Brutal because it is true.

it's amazing what a government can accomplish when Jared Kushner isn't in charge of fucking it all to hell

A very well-done piece on the deranged lies and bizarre statements by House @GOPLeader McCarthy. One possible explanation for his re-embrace of Trump: On January 18, Trump called him a “pussy,” per NYT’s Maggie Haberman.

The 2020 presidential election was not stolen. Anyone who claims it was is spreading THE BIG LIE, turning their back on the rule of law, and poisoning our democratic system.

What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.