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i don’t live in new york currently but i will flip shit (positively) if zohran wins

you’re welcome, new yorkers, for my support from philadelphia. we couldn’t have done it without me

Zohran Mamdani, my country, Philadelphia, yearns for freedom

it came to me in a vision

it’s so hot i’m running from shaded area to shaded area to stay out of the sun like it’s that one level from mass effect 2. you guys know what i mean

my husband never responds to my texts so now he’s my diary

i know people think boston has the worst drivers but philly has got to be number 2. i just really truly almost got run over by a seafood truck that blew a red light not even five minutes after i saw a city bus turn left on red and not slow down even a little

would love to go more than three seconds of scrolling without seeing that video of the blonde woman flirting with the guy for what i assume is a youtube dating show. that’d be great

they’re calling it “profoundly frizzy summer”

immensely fucked up that tupperware is an mlm. and that i didn’t know this until now

Sorry, not sorry, not going to care about the Orc Wars because I grew up with an alcoholic, psychologically abusive father in constant state of distress, anxiety and worry about the future. Hearing the key in the door every evening was my own "Orc Wars" for 20 years

2017, at a house party. everything that could go wrong was, at that point, going wrong. and yet i continued to serve

they should invent a postdoc for people with masters and don’t you DARE say that’s a phd

a few years ago i worked as a barista for a cafe that closed after 3 months but when they opened they posted this on their instagram. and i’d like to take this opportunity to tell you all that i did not say this

if 28 years later isn’t good i’ll be upset. please don’t reply to this telling me you didn’t like it. thank you

i may just be cooking something up… watch this space

Katherine gets it—brilliant as always

hahaha yeah for sure. totally. could you tell my grandma that. hahahaha

if someone says “we’ve met before” and your response is “ nice to meet you” you’re a bad person

Sundays (: