The only edge I have when it comes to dating is that I will always, always know what I want to eat.

Idk about yall but I always feel extra special when I see green circles on my IG stories. From the people I hate.

To the people who are whitesplaining Martin Luther King Jr. and how “he did things the right way” on social media, let me just throw a FACT out at you that he was still brutally beaten, hosed, humiliated, dehumanized and arrested on 29 different occasions.

The silver lining of this pandemic is when it’s all over I can travel to crowded destinations, like Italy... without the tourists. Or Italians.

My favorite thing to do at restaurants is to wait for my server to ask "is there anything else you'd want?". Why yes I’d like an efficient government, a cure to Alzheimer’s and more people who can tell the difference between "your" and "you're". Some extra limes too thank you.

No I don’t have ADHD. You’re just not that interesting.