(to the tune of "we didn’t start the fire") peter griffin, lois griffin, meg griffin, brian griffin, stewie griffin, chris griffin, carter pewterschmidt

here’s why john fetterman having a stroke was the straightest moment of 2022

JUST ANNOUNCED! 𝐻𝑜𝓉 𝒢𝑜𝓈𝓈𝒾𝓅 with Jonathan van Halem this Friday, March 8th! Jonathan van Halem (Clickhole) pauses his perpetual gab sesh to host an evening of stand-up comedy featuring Phoebe Robinson, Kyle Gordon + MORE TBA! Tickets on sale now: tinyurl.com/4d5frbu3

folks, hot gossip comedy is back and better than ever. this month's line up features, Judah Friedlander, depths of wikipedia!, Michael Kandel, Jo Sunday, and more. discount code in the description. all at littlefield on saturday, june 8th 😎

i did a blind taste test

Ignore the pundits. Ignore the models. Ignore the vibes. Jonathan van Halem and I have solved the election and shared our findings with McSweeney's. mcsweeneys.net/articles/the-r…

chandler and i did what everyone else in brooklyn comedy was afraid to do: speak truth to power to presidential historians

(me if i was in wicked) you’re cool. don’t come to shiz tomorrow

i am breaking my twitter silence to announce that i am hosting hot gossip at the bell house. included in admission one (1) free kissing lesson with... yours truly

mrs. met is the kind of woman that billy joel writes songs about