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As a film buff (as you can tell by my many cinema awards in the photo), I was stoked to read this book “You Talkin’ To Me” by Brian Abrams. Super fucking good! I give it 10 out of 10 dildos!

Remember when Apple put a U2 album on everyone’s phone and everyone freaked out because they got a free U2 album.

CAN’T👏GET👏THE👏 FUCKING 👏SONG👏DO👏THEY👏KNOW👏IT’S👏CHRISTMAS?👏OUT👏OF👏MY👏FUCKING👏HEAD👏

#happynewyear #woodrocket

Lost 50lbs. Plateau’d. Ate extra carbs for the holiday and skipped going to the gym a couple days a week. Now it’s time to lose another 60lbs. Fuck off again carbs. I’ll miss you.

Porn Parody: Nosferatits

My house isn’t on fire yet. Going to the gym.

Feels weird to never have won a dick-shaped Porn Award before.

As someone with heavy anxiety, I’m often looking for a calm and relaxing and positive show to watch or rewatch. If your brain needs a break from the stress of these insane times, here are some suggestions. Feel free to add more suggestions in the comments.

Life Update: I’m now making dick jokes. Always was. But also now. Still.

I think it would have been really neat if Jay-Z’s Hard Knock Life was just a rap retelling of Annie the musical. 🎶 “Hi my name is Annie”, I live in an orphanage. “We love you Miss Hannigan”, No we don’t. She’s a bitch. 🎶

Happy Afternoon Nap Day to all that celebrate.

Update on my Medical Travels: I’m Cancer Free! PSA 55 to PSA 0.09 to PSA <0.03…Yes! If you know prostate cancer, you know the happy story of those numbers — and the relief of hearing my surgeon say, “You can now consider yourself cancer-free.” Life has been a whirlwind lately,

Coming Soon to stores everywhere! New collab between Wood Rocket and Magic Wand! Ask your favorite stores if they’ve ordered them yet! #pins #earrings #magicwand #woodrocket

Male Porn Performers/Male Models: Looking to license nude HQ photos for products like Calendars, Playing Cards, etc. Licensing fee or trade for product for you to sign/sell to fans. If interested let me know.

If you are in L.A. on Wednesday night and want to enjoy a night filled with classic softcore porn, this is going to be a fun night! It’s a free screening! Reserve your seat now!