Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile
Matthew Goldin

@matthewgoldin

matthewgoldin.substack.com

ID: 2252672827

linkhttps://hessepress.storenvy.com/products/36777027-matthew-goldin-matthew calendar_today18-12-2013 23:20:47

15,15K Tweet

26,26K Followers

612 Following

Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Puberty turned my penis into yet another arm of the state, a glorified hose for churning out new citizens. I wish something more subversive shot out of there.

Pierre L’Fauex (@lafauexprod) 's Twitter Profile Photo

What if words, and letters, are wrong? They are just a bunch of made up symbols, used to try and communicate our abstract thoughts What if they are not even right ?

derek (@websitehomepage) 's Twitter Profile Photo

We've got fun episodes with characters such as Patrick, Jesse Farrer(sp?), Ivy Wolk and Joey Garcia. Not to mention our hosts, a guy who mutilated a dead frog as a joke and the other one appeared nude on stage while reciting Jim Gaffigan jokes. Why not sub even if you hate us?

Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile Photo

Close friends and loved ones shouldn’t be pronounced “dead at the scene,” and the Los Angeles County medical examiner should have nothing to report at all on such matters. In fact, they should be miles away, well-remunerated but bored as hell because there’s nothing to do.

Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I’m agnostic as to the existence of Spider-Man. There’s no proof he exists, and there’s no proof he doesn’t. It’s the only possible rational view on the matter. I will say, however, that the films don’t resonate with me. Always been grossed out by webs.

Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile Photo

If the negative review I got in the London Review of Books made you not want to read my book, check this out for a more nuanced take.

Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I have a lot of great things planned for this semester. It’s probably wise to reserve your spot before the class fills up. If your mother enrolls with you, she’ll get 20% off tuition. Not a bad idea for a Mother’s Day gift.

I have a lot of great things planned for this semester. It’s probably wise to reserve your spot before the class fills up. If your mother enrolls with you, she’ll get 20% off tuition. Not a bad idea for a Mother’s Day gift.
𝕷𝖎𝖑 𝕴𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖊𝖙 | 𝗡𝗘𝗪 𝗠𝗢𝗗𝗘𝗟𝗦 🎲🎲 (@lilinternet) 's Twitter Profile Photo

the Matthew Goldin book "Matthew" feels like a new kind of humor. does wild twisted shit with form and language. one could say he goes "jigsaw" on language (puppet from saw movies). funniest book I've ever read. out from Hesse Press .

the <a href="/matthewgoldin/">Matthew Goldin</a> book "Matthew" feels like a new kind of humor. does wild twisted shit with form and language. one could say he goes "jigsaw" on language (puppet from saw movies). funniest book I've ever read. out from <a href="/HessePress/">Hesse Press</a> .
Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I care deeply about every living being on earth. I adore this planet, from its crust to its skies. And the cosmos broadly speaking seems really great!

Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I've never had a difficult or challenging experience, and I highly doubt I'll ever experience loss or its accompanying grief, deep and abiding.

Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile Photo

I'm officially leaving Twitter at the end of 2026. It's been a blast, y'all. But it's just not the same anymore, which is why I've decided to become increasingly disenchanted with the platform over the next 19 months before finally moving on to newer, better things.

Matthew Goldin (@matthewgoldin) 's Twitter Profile Photo

My mom and I taught a class called Rhetoric & Wit for Digital Natives. I enjoyed getting to know the talented artists who enrolled. I learned from them. I enjoyed getting to know my mom. This show grad show is going to be really good. Their creativity will be on full display.

My mom and I taught a class called Rhetoric &amp; Wit for Digital Natives. I enjoyed getting to know the talented artists who enrolled. I learned from them. I enjoyed getting to know my mom. This show grad show is going to be really good. Their creativity will be on full display.