I am so stressed and unhappy. I don't want to keep doing this anymore. I hate work. I hate that all I do is go to work and come home and cook dinner and sit in front of the tv and go to bed and get up and go to fucking work. I don't want to be alive.
Brody king used to go by Nathan and in my fucking house he joked about how he left a tire mark on a black girl's face during an accident. He mentioned her race and laughed about it. I haven't talked to him in 15 years but that's my number one take away from our tim together.
You ever just cry at the hopelessness of it all. I want kids I want to sing happy songs. I sit on the floor on days my wife is still at work and I cry. Everyday we get further from ok. We're fucked and we keep on acting like anything matters.
I do not matter. No matter what you say, I am a man of no consequence. I will live til whenever I die and nothing will be better or worse for it. And at the end of everything what difference does any of us make?
I only like music. Mostly things that are punk rock or punk rock adjacent. It's honest. It says what it means. It's not just there to dance or check off boxes. It's pure.
I think if Elon musk died suddenly from being a huge piece of shit garbage person who has benefitted from and definitely caused deaths of poor people. Like he should just die.