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trains

Nothing like hopping on Twitter to see a bunch of newly emboldened antisemites 💀

I went to gay loser land and they said you’re like a God to them

And Google Wave!!

Lower class: wife doesn’t work Middle class: wife works Upper middle class: wife doesn’t work Upper class: wife runs a small business that loses $10k/month

Desperately screenshotting Dril tweets like I'm trying to save scrolls from the Library of Alexandria as it burns.

Daylight Saving Time is increasingly hard to notice when my digital are devices are like, "What? Nothing happened. We know what time it is." And my stove is left blinking and screaming, "IT HAPPENED! TIME SHIFTED UNNATURALLY! THEY'RE ALL LYING! ONLY I KNOW! ONLY I REMEMBER!"

“Ben Shapiro” (Author of I Am A Parody Account)

Twitter only had enough engineers remaining to keep it on for one more night, but it miraculously kept working for eight.

Usually I'm against celebrities being cast as voice actors just to have a name attached, but seeing Cate Blanchett cast in Del Toro's Pinocchio, as the monkey, who does not talk and just makes monkey noises the whole time, is extremely fucking funny

there is a sick kind of humor in modern people not seeing what's so horrifying about sisyphus being forced to perform a task that he can never complete, every day, for all time. what was once a punishment from the gods is now a 9 to 5

rat

My wife and I are obsessed with #Tchia so I made her some bookmarks ❤️ Tchia (Awaceb) 🌴🦜🌸 thank you for creating such a beautiful game!

GOT MY WING S(auce) 🤠 Thank you for Proxying, Peacock and Buffalo Wild Wings !

Sam M was actually a failed experiment by production in which a lifelike animatronic was given a ChatGPT voice box that was trained solely on Bachelorette teaser snippets. The PA responsible has been fired. AH Arden Myrin #WYATR

Love Jenn speaking up for what she needs and deserves in a relationship, but Sam M got off way too easy. Strand him in the desert or on a glacier or somewhere with no mirrors he can flex into. AH Arden Myrin #WYATR

I really need Delta Delta Customer Support 🅧 to explain how I can book tickets and confirm a pet reservation in JULY, and then be told at the check in desk that there is no more room for pets on our flight. Agent claimed it’s first come first served AT THE AIRPORT?