guitar center employees when you ask for the center of a guitar

horse named PedophileHitler because of its parents named "PedophilesAreBad" and "IDontLikeHitler"

just watched American Psycho. this mf isn't "literally me" at ALL

I sentence you to 8 minutes of explaining the rules to a board game over slightly-too-loud music to a group of people who only wanted to play to take a quirky photo for Instagram

Apparently a “Rorschach test” is just a bunch of drawings of me being molested

🏀??

this fanfic shit too easy

New Yorkers just spend all day thinking about how special going to the store is

Bare minimum for holding a conversation: Family Guy, American Dad, The Cleveland Show, The Simpsons, South Park, King of the Hill, Archer, Bob's Burgers, Beavis and Butt-Head, The Boondocks, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, The Venture Bros., Smiling Friends, Rick and Morty, and Futurama.

in these caves its easy to get all.. turned around... *lights a torch revealing my pants are on backwards*

Devil on my shoulder: it’s Friday night. Have 7-10 beers. Come on do it 😈 you know you want to 😈 Angel on my shoulder: only have 3-5 beers

obligatory "the hardest yugioh card art ever memed"

I hate the whole "every video needs to have stakes" bullshit every youtuber panders to oh if I don't complete this run I have to slap my balls subscribe for my CBT bro stfu and run the nuzlocke jfc

at 30 years old this is how it feels to get excited about literally anything I get into nowadays